So there's nothing really wrong, but I find myself in emotional doldrums nonetheless. Por que? I usually ADORE the Holiday Season and its many traditions and celebrations. Has my inner child suddenly matured too much to enjoy the magic one always finds with such ease during this time of year? My heart shakes its head and laughs, as that will never happen, let's be honest.
Here's what I think: there are certain things I always assume for the Holidays and those things are not lining up as expected. I love to go crazy with gift giving; I love to go Home to Idaho to visit; I love to sing in Christmas programs; etc. Despite my best efforts and intentions none of these things are coming to fruition this year. Okay, big deal. I mean, so my traditions are a little unintentionally skewed this year, so what? Why am I allowing this to bring me down (because I am responsible for how I react to the various stimuli)? Does my Holiday Spirit dishevel with such ease because I have never built it upon a stronger, truer foundation? (Yikes, btw!)
I think I am being lazy. I really do. It takes effort sometimes to put on a happy face until it you really feel it. It is so easy to feel depressed, and Society guarantees every individual's entitlement with a Life Time Warranty, does it not? My plans may all be falling through the cracks, but that is okay. There will be other Christmases and some of them are sure to go as planned.
My house is not flooded, burned or destroyed, as are those of many families throughout our world. I have a loving people in my life, both family and friends, whose thoughts turn to those they love more than ever at this time of year. I am blessed never to want for love in my life. So many others in our world cannot say the same, or do not feel it even if it is there for them. I even have a decent paying job! And most importantly, no one has thrown (or desired to throw!) a pair of size 10 shoes at my little old noggin' regardless of my many imperfections. Phew!
What is this Season really about? It is about the Savior and His divine birth. When I think of this, my little plans and disappointments become things of naught.
(Funny how just typing this out has expunged most of my former langour. I feel better already--thanks for listening!)
Merry Christmas everybody. I miss you!
