In a Constant State of Philately

Some time back, I mentioned that I had been meaning to be more open and forthcoming in my writings. And it is that vein of honesty that I approach the delicate subject of my Philately.

Philately (pronounced: fuh-LAH-tuh-lee) actually runs in my family, but not rampantly. I inherited it directly through my paternal Gran and her mother before her. I've even heard that my Cousin Dave is also afflicted, but have yet to confirm this as certain. Obviously I am curious to see whether the condition will be inherited by my unborn child, but only time will tell. It wasn't until I was in my late 20's that I even realized I had indeed inherited the characteristic tendencies. What are the symptoms you may well ask? Hm. It's difficult to say, as they can be both acute or of a more latent and/or casual strain, but here are some of mine:

• Squinting
• Peeling
• Hording
• Acute Attention to Details
• Occasional Licking
• Incessant Searching
• Strong Instincts Toward Preservation

Bottom line? I'm a stamp collector, guys. That's right! Ha ha! I am constantly on the outlook for a good stamp whether at home or at work. And my office position allows me access to occasional international stamps, too, which I am always swift to acquire. Pretty great stuff.

As I mentioned before, I inherited my stamp collecting tendencies from my Gran Haeberle who got me started a few years ago. She has since sent me magazines and even a book to help my symptoms sink in as deep as possible. I treasure this hobby as a link to my Gran and her mother, my Nana Templin.

In my pursuits of acquisition I have had to keep my eyes open in the most unlikely of places. A keen example is the time I went to the annual insect fair at the LA County Museum of Natural History. Obviously I was there to buy copious amounts of dead and pinned insects for my other well-known hobby and collection. But, Lo! Suddenly looming before me was a gentleman selling collections of insect stamps!! Hell-o?! How could I resist? Well, I couldn't, so now I've got a lovely and rather exotic little display of insect stamps from the following countries: Spain, Mongolia, Germany, Mali, (former) Czechoslovakia, Congo, Belgium, and a few that appear to be in an Asian language and also a few in Russian. Pretty great right? I keep them displayed on my bedroom bookshelf, and I always smile when I stop to think of the randomness that aligned to help me purchase them.

Another fun time for Philately and me came a couple of years ago when the U.S. Postal Service introduced the Forever stamp. No doubt you've heard all about it, but just in case this is your introduction into the subject as a whole, here's the 411 on what makes these stamps so COOL. Forever stamps will always (ALWAYS-- as in "forever", eh?!) match the value of whatever 1st class stamp is in existence. Isn't that awesome?! So let's say that I want to mail a letter in 25 years and all I have is a Forever stamp. Ding! Ding! Ding! I am good to go! Even if my future grandchildren want to use them, they will also be good to go. LOVE IT. So I've got a booklet of them stashed away as a part of my ever-growing collection, of course. And while it is true that most often a post marked stamp is the more valuable, in this instance I feel great about just leaving them blank and intact in their original little book. Click here to see what it looks like. I bet you've seen it! And you thought you were immune to Philately! Ha!

Alright, so now you not only know what Philately is, but also that I suffer from it off my own free will. *grin* And actually, I can't help but acknowledge my other Haeberle relatives, specifically my Dad, as well in the line up of those who gave me this "tendency". My Dad is an AWESOME Historian, and has ever instilled the love of past peoples and items within me. I grew up in an environment filled to the max with learners and collectors who were always enthusiastic to share their thoughts, collections and experiences with me. I treasure my family! (But that is a whole 'nuther post!)

So let me know what you think! Are you horrified? Do you want to learn more? Was this the most non sequitur posting of all time? Are you bored stiff? Do you have lots of stamps to send my wee little way? Let me know! 'Cus I'm in a constant state of Philately and ready to go!

Love,

Autumn

Prego, yo!

Yes, I am pregnant.

Yes, this is awesome.

YES, I am totally SICK!

Oy.

I am truly going to make the effort to keep everyone posted on how things are going for my pregnancy. Just know that it depends on how I am feeling day by day for the time being.

In the meantime, I would like you to know that my first prenatal visit with my doctor is set for next Thursday, July 8th at 2:45. Michael will be joining me, so that is pretty cool and helps me feel less anxious, since he doesn't have that much of a clue either. And yes, our joint ignorance crazily enough does bring me joy. Don't get me wrong, I've read aaaaaaallllll about "what to expect" and all that jazz, but it's still my/our first visit, so kind of freaky cool. Makes this whole pregnancy thing suddenly very real. Or at least as real as my round the clock nausea.

And for those who really, really want to know how it's going with all that lovely nausea, I will break it down for you. I feel sick pretty much 24/7. BUT, I have only vomited about 2-3 times so far, and honestly, felt better after such. The only times I get to the Puking Point ("PP") is if I go too long without eating. So now that I'm sly to that little nugget of knowledge, I rarely get to that point. I have lost a little weight, but nothing at all alarming, and I am sure I will make up for that in the coming months. I am also able to sip a 16 oz. Jamba Juice (w/protein boost) every afternoon and that helps me be able to eat dinner later. So I am definitely eating small meals, and just more so in the second half of the day. Things I seem to tolerate well so far: cheese and strawberry stuffs. Separately though, of course. I am not at all into cravings yet--just aversions. >sigh<>

Other random things to share:

• Yes, we do plan to find out the baby's gender. :) Not even a question there.
• Baby is due approximately mid-February. Dr. should be giving us an official due date at the appt. next week, so stay tuned, my friends and family!
• I love unsolicited prego advice--about morning sickness, delivery, etc. What I don't like are the random horror stories some people feel the "need" or "responsibility" to share. Don't get me wrong, we'll still be friends if you tell me something whacky-scary, but I won't like it very much. If there is a purpose to the freaky story, sure, but if it's just something random and exhilerating you like to share...yeah, maybe let it pass. Remember, I have always been melodramtic enough, and we've now added high doses of hormones...
• We are leaning toward family names for the baby. So be forewarned! :D
• The nursery is most likely going to be pale green. Mike's idea, and I like that it can be touted towards both guy and gal fatties by adding some accent colors.
• We have been crib shopping and think we have picked one out. Will post picks as soon as we finalize.
• Yes, I am taking prenatal vites and have been for a couple of weeks now. I take them right before I go to bed to make sure they don't make me feel worse.
• As of this writing I am about 7.5 weeks along on my journey. It's crazy and I am very happy and feel blessed every minute--even despite the nausea. Still content and pluggin' along.
• We do plan to start a gift registry, so as soon as I am feeling well again, I will get that information out to all who are interested. Please feel free to make suggestions as to what you think we'll need/want the most. Remember: we are basically clueless, bless our hearts. :)

So I'm biased, but I think that's a pretty great start for now. Let me know if I missed anything, and I will plan to include it in my next post. I love you guys, and I am so thankful for each of you in my life. I have to admit to having felt a little sad from time to time that my mom isn't here with me to check on me and talk to me. The Lord has blessed me though with such a strong and sincere group of my family and friends. Not a day goes by that one or more of you doesn't check in on me. I thank you for the part you are playing in my life right now. I hope I can show my gratitude more as I begin to feel better!

All my love,

Autumn

Feminine Fabulosity: The Flower Duet

There is something so delicate and lovely about spring blossoms and flowers, isn't there? They massage my soul's eyes and start my heart to singing. Do you know what I mean?

I don't know if you're like me, and the Music is in you? For me, Music can paralyze me with its sweetness. Music can propel me into action. Music can (and frequently does!) melt me into a completely different--and better--person. I believe this to be due to the fact that Music is literally part of my genetic makeup. My sweets, I assure you I have never been more serious.

Because the Music is in me, I feel certain melodies, certain songs can influence me to embrace my feminity more than possibly any other venue can. "The Flower Duet" from the 1883 opera "Lakme" by French composer Leo Delibes is one such piece of music. Not only is it lovely in and of itself with its interweaving soprano and alto parts, it literally changes me as I soak it into my soul. And you know what else? Whether you recognise the title or not, I bet you've already heard it and loved it!

So, without further ado, please click here and take a delicious taste, won't you? And let me know what you think when you get back! Are there songs that bring out your inner feminine fabulosity? I hope you will please share them if there are!

Love,

Autumn

Feminine Fabulosity: Some Favorite "Elle" Words

For years I have been intrigued by the store front of a certain building adjacent to the 405 North freeway entrance (which takes me home from the LA LDS Temple). It is a white building with green trim and a lovely set of steps leading up to the front door. I've never seen anyone go in or out of it which, to me, has given it an aire similar to what Charley Bucket must have felt towards Willie Wonka's Chocolate Factory. On the building are the words "Louise Green Millinery Co." and just the word millinery fills my sentimental, old fashioned heart with awe. When was the last time someone you know spoke the word millinery? So cool!

Okay, so after years and years of passing Louise Green Millinery Co., I finally remembered to write the name down in my little red pocket book a few weeks ago so I could Google it. And the results? Totally awesome, if way out of my current budget and social setting! *wink* Check these little wonders out, will you? They take me to a place where you might here Miss Eliza Dolittle holler, "C'mon Dover! Move your bloomin' a**!" if you get my meaning. In a classic case of champagne taste meets rootbeer budget, here is a nibble of some of their sumptuous, tantalizing hats:

Cascading ribbons...

..and feather brimmed cloches?!

Didn't know you NEEDED a hat before, did you? Ha ha! Only problem (outside of budgeting of course) is obtaining an event to warrant such frosting in the first place. You know what I mean, chilli beans? Ah well. Oh! Before I forget, I also came across a recent article written about Louise Green Millinery Co., and have attached it here . Even if you don't read the article, be sure to scroll to the bottom for several of the most fabulous hats I have ever seen. FABULOUS, people, FAB.U.LOUS. I would love to hear what you think of all of these hats, so let me know!

And now for my other find of the month, from a hippy-ish company called "Lavender Girl" . While browsing a shop called Beauty Clinic (in Calabasas, near where I work), I stumbled across this little beauty of a hair clip:

And here's what it looks like in your hair (if you are standing there looking "nekkid"):

Isn't it lovely? I particularly like the wispy little curled feathers. Reminds me a little of the birds' feathers in the Dr. Seuss story when the birds kept vying for the most amazing tail feathers--just on a very small scale, of course. Now I am just trying to figure out where one could where something like this (while wearing lots of clothes, of course. What is UP with the nekkid looking models these days?!?!). What do you think? Where would you go wearing something like this? Would you pair it down with jeans and a cardigan? Or would you wear it with something sleek and sexy? Would you buy it only to have it sit collecting dust in your jewelry box (which is what I am afraid would be my case...)? Tell me your thoughts!

Thank you for joining me for this month's "Feminine Fabulosity"! I will see what I can come up with for the ides of March. :) If there is anything wonderfully feminine you've found recently you think deserves to be highlighted (whether fashion, or literature, or music, etc.), I hope you will send me the details so we can get the word out and spread the sweetness. 'Cus let's face it, sometimes it is just fun to be GIRLY! And lately I feel true feminity is harder and harder to find amidst all the "sexy, sexy, sexy" everywhere. Let's work together to bring the good stuff back and make it easier to find.

Love,

Autumn

"De Nile" Ain't Just a River

You've probably noticed my lack of talking lately. It's been a kind of rough time since a little before Christmas. And yet, it's also been a time of great blessings and a LOT of love, too. I guess I've just had weighty things on my little ol' mind. I've been carrying the dead weight of sadness in my heart as I've been going about being my "normal" self, which is something I can totally do and not be fake. I can just do it. I've had some practice in Life, ya know? So I'm now going to breach those subjects that have been in my heart and hopefully set my heart free to get back to being the more perky me. I am not talking about these things because I want pity or hand holding, but rather to be better understood. I am very strong, and I work constantly to remain so. However, I do manage to bottle things up unintentionally for too long a stretch, and this is me working on getting better at not doing that. I need to be more Honest, and part of me doing that means allowing others more into my heart, my mind, and my Life.

So #1. Mike's longest and best friend , Tim Sandor, committed suicide in December. It was awful. It was SO awful. I am not going to get into specifics of how or why, but suffice it to say none of us were expecting it and he was a beautiful, sweet, talented and successful man. Tim left behind a little 12 yr. old son (named Michael, after my husband), a devestated mother, sisters, step father, girlfriend and many, many friends. As if the loss of Tim wasn't sad enough, family members and loved ones almost immediately began vying for his belongings. We saw selfishness like you would not believe, and we tried to step in to make sure Tim's mother Snow especially would not get shut out, but our efforts failed and after praying and taking counsel with Pete & Rosa (Mike's parents) we politely withdrew. We stayed withdrawn until January 30, when we attended the spreading of Tim's ashes down in the Port of Los Angeles area. Watching Tim's ashes be spread and dumped into the ocean was one of the hardest things I have been through in a very, very long time. I realized by going through this experience that I do not approve of cremation and that I do value having one spot to go to in order to pay homage to the deceased. As Tim's ashes floated out into the sea and began to dissipate, we tossed roses and rose petals to make the journey with them/him. I kissed my roses and tossed them into the water, already moist from my tears. Tim had been a Navy Seal, and before we left his girlfriend said she wished she could see a dolphin to know Tim was there with us. I bowed my head and said a silent prayer to Heavenly Father asking for dolphins to come to us if there were any in the area. Nothing but sea lions and masses of pelicans and seagulls were around though. The boat made a wide circle around Tim's ashes and the roses, and we started back to port. The birds and sea lions followed us the entire way, which was really kind of special to me. I hoped that would be enough to lighten Tim's girlfriends heart. It seemed to help. Then she turned away to bury her face in her father's shoulder and Mike saw them. They were leaping and they were following the boat. They were a small school of dolphins and a large answer to prayers for wounded hearts. I called over the boat's engine noise to Tim's girlfriend that there were dolphins! She beamed and said she knew Tim was there, she just knew it. And my heart mended just a little bit. The denial Mike and I had both felt over the entire mess began to melt away. In a year's time, Michael will go to the temple to perform the needed work for his best friend Tim, and all will be set right for Tim, and hopefully for Michael and the rest of us, too. Even in darkness there can still be light found if we will but ask and seek.

And #2: I am in denial over my Dad's diagnosis of Alzheimers. Total denial. I have been holding this inside for quite some time so as not to cause stress in the family. Holding it inside is only causing me to have stress cankers in my mind and heart though. I just don't believe it and I am not going to hide my disbelief any longer. I will not. Hiding the way I really feel is not honest and not healthy. Does this mean I do not support my father? Of course not! I truly will always be there for my Dad no matter what. Truly. But I do not swallow all of this Alzheimer's crap. And to me it really is crap. And I know this will sound offensive, but I don't care what anyone says to me about it to try to change my mind. Hey man, they don't call in denial for nothing. And yes, it is a choice I am actively making every day. Does this have to do with the paralyzing feeling of losing the only parent I have left? Very probably in some respects, and unless you are standing in my shoes, and have lost a parent--one of the two people in your life who will always love you no matter what, and have known you since you were born, and believe in you more than you could ever believe in yourself--well then, you just do not understand this at all. And yet, even with all of THAT, (and I have given this more thought than you will ever, ever know), that still doesn't explain everything that makes this whole diagnosis unbelievable to me. And there are many, many things that I feel and think that if I was to say out loud even to most of my family members would ricochet around and hurt people. So I am exercising some needed caution in even admitting my denial at all. It is not right to explode my denial all over everyone without thinking of how it will effect everyone. I get that, I do. And yes, I have been praying and researching, and all the things I am sure you're going to want to suggest for me to do. But you guys, I just DO NOT believe it. And you can't make me, as silly and childish as I know that statement to be. So do not call me to talk to me about this. No one ever calls me anyway, so this would be a bad point to start calling me just to try to change my mind on this matter. If you cared about calling me before and talking to me, it would be okay to continue calling me. But since no one has called me before, this is not the right place to begin. If you call me, call me because you love me and want a relationship with me. NOT because my denial makes you uncomfortable.

Okay, that's probably enough ugly for one post. I only wish I hadn't allowed this to fester so much that it became this way. I'm sorry. I really am working on learning to be more honest and also to do it in correct and loving ways, but I have a long, long way to go. Please continue to be patient with me. Again, my intent is not to hurt or be selfish. I just want to be able to be real with myself. If I have offended you, please forgive me. I hope to do better by you in the future.

Love,

Autumn

For Michael, With Love on Valentine's Day

When I think of Love, there is a face

And when I think of Love, there is a name.

When I think of Love, there are certain memories

And certain smiles, and certain eyes.

For when I think of anything about you,

Love is all I feel.

Happy Valentine's Day, Sweetheart.

I love you so dearly with all my heart.

Love,

Your Aubala

Sometimes

Sometimes it is hard not to be jealous.

That's about it.

Thank you.

;)